I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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