my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
We have started to decorate penises.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
