So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I still have a little drunk in my system
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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