I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
