can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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