i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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