just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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