Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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