It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
