I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
MIDGETS
????
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
