if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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