I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
