end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I deserve to be covered in dicks
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
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