seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Randomize
