How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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