You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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