Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Do vagina's smell?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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