I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
