at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Randomize
