her vagina looked like bernie madoff
either way he was missing a nipple.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
