oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
