he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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