ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
