What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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