this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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