we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Houston, we have a blender
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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