i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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