When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Randomize
