He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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