ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Girls should come with a carfax report
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
