I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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