are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize
