dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
