Dual....:-)
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
