Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Randomize
