When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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