It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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