I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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