so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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