He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
