those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
