I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
