I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
