we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize