Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
