this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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