Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
