dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
