I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
