I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
